I find it easier to be pissed and miserable sometimes than it is to be happy. Being cheerful is hard.

I certainly hope you have all felt the same, or I shall truly feel....miserable.

Like when you get a big ass bonus, only to have big ass bills to pay. Only to have dreamed of the things you could do or buy with what was left, only to have your car need repair 3 days before the deposit hit the bank... and be left with nothing.


Like moving your family to another state for fame and fortune, only to find the fame and fortune wasn't worth dealing with the union loving, lazy ass, back-stabbing, pieces of shit you get to work with.


Like deciding to move home, with or without BP, instead of moving to wherever the next job takes you, only to have that information leaked to family members. Then the reality of the housing market crashes that illusion you hung on the wall right over your big, fat noggin.


Then you see your miserable looking ass in the hallway mirror, and you realize you've been acting like a chump. And you are no chump.

You realize you are debt free (ok...except the mortgage), and you should be thankful you got the bonus. Besides, your wife didn't mean it when she said you could go to London without her. And hey, those repairs were cheaper than a new car, and she's running like a hot rod now.

You realize the move has made you stronger, professionally and personally. You figure out those lazy bastards at work are really leadership challenges in disguise, and you have the skill set to turn them into performers because that is why you were chosen to come to this miserable place in the first place.

You realize you still have things you want to do while you are away from your family. Gettysburg still awaits, as does another trip to DC. You are on the downward slope, and it is only a matter of time now before your children will see your parents on a regular basis.

And you learn to stop your bitching and crying.

And you learn to wash the negativity from your mind, because that is not who you are.