There's a couple thousand bucks drifting off into space...

Check out the grease gun w/ Braycote in it drift away.

That Which Lays Heavy on My Mind

Out of the few of you who read this, most will not finish. This has the potential of being a little too long and a little too dry.  You are forewarned.

When I first started writing on this blog, it was just a place for me to write.  Nobody knew it existed, so nobody read it. Tonight, I just need a place to write.  Unfortunately, my medium is now public.  So be it.  I must not be that private person most of us think we are.  Or maybe I just don't care who knows.  Or maybe I want you to know, so I don't have to worry about what you are thinking when you take that second, or third, glance.  Yes.  I see it when you do that.

In the summer, I was diagnosed with Follicular Mucinosis.  

Say what?

Follicular mucinosis (FM) is a rare dermatosis characterized by mucin deposits in the pilosebaceous units. It is divided into a primary-benign type and a secondary type associated mostly with lymphomas. No standard effective therapy is available for the primary FM while in the secondary form treatment is aimed against the underlying disease.

So what does that mean?  

Well, there's a few things that should jump out at you, the first being it is rare.  Yipee for me.  I feel like I won the lottery.  Second, is that nasty little word lymphomas.  Although there is not a lot of data out there, I read where it turns into cancer 40% of the time.  No worries, the mortality rate is pretty damn low.  The last thing that should have jumped out at you was there is no standard effective therapy.  I've read where Corticosteroids, dapsone, mepacrimine, interferons and superficial X-ray have all been used.  Let's not forget photodynamic therapy and interferon alpha-2b at a dose of 6 million U subcutaneously three times a week, and acitretin 35 mg/day, for 6 months.

So imagine my surprise when I finally went to a dertamtologist and he told me the good news after getting the results of a biopsy.  The way he stuttered and stammered with the word lymphoma was really encouraging.  It sounded like the confidence President Bush excudes in a briefing on the economy.  

In case you have not figured it out yet, the f'ing bumps on my face are follicular mucinosis.  Just for the dummies out there thinking this was something hidden from view.  

So every morning when I look in the mirror to shave my face I here James say, "That was just your life."  Ok.  Not really, but you get the point.  No?  FFS.  Let me put it another way.  I'm reminded of my current situation all of the time.  Getting out of the shower, brushing my teeth, walking past a mirror, seeing my reflection in the mirror when I change lanes, when somebody takes that second glance, when their eyes drift to my face instead of my f'ing eyes when talking to me.  

When I go to sleep at night.  

When I give my daughter her very own Taylor Swift CD, and she says, "Thank you, Daddy", with all the sincerity only an innocent child can have.

Now do you get it?

Boo f'ing hoo!!  Not really.  I'm just framing this conversation for you.  

When I was first told, I was not that bothered by it.  As the prescriptions have not worked, and the stares have continued, I find myself thinking about it more and more.  As I research more, and see pictures of how unpleasant it could become, how unpleasant treatment could be...  it weighs on you, is all I'm saying.  Surprisingly.  It weighs on me.  When I least expect it, it weighs on me.  I am surprised at my inability to compartmentalize this in my brain.  Afterall, it is not that bad.  I mean, come on.  It could be much worse.  So I do not mean to complain.  

I thought if I wrote about it, then I could have my little moment of feeling sorry for myself.  My own little woe is me time.  And then move on.  Because it is not that bad.  All I have are bumps on my face, and a few stares.  Even a few questions now and then, a biopsy or two every 2-3 months just to make sure Mr. Lymphoma has not decided to join the party, and a band aid on the face for a week.

Tick tock.  Time to shove this into the corner of my brain.

McCain Rally

On Sunday I decided to go to a John McCain rally. Jenna tagged along on our little trip. I asked her to come for 2 reasons. The first reason was all selfish. I just wanted some company. Secondly, I wanted her to see this part of the election process. I wanted her to see a candidate ask for her vote. Now obviously she cannot vote, but you get the point. Now don't worry. I did not allow her to wave a John McCain sign or anything like that. When she gets old enough to vote, I want her to make her own WELL INFORMED decision. Since she is not old enough to make that decision, I figured it was not fair to have her showing support for a candidate.

The doors opened at 8:45 am (yeah right), so Jenna and I got there around 8 am. We stood in line outside waiting to get in. Once we got inside, we were heading towards the bleachers when I saw we could get center stage, fourth row back, if we decided to stand. This is what we did, and we proceeded to stand for a few more hours in one place. Jenna was a trooper and didn't complain. OK. She complained a little, but it did suck. Jenna had an old lady with John McCain stickers on her cheeks push in front of her. Jenna's old man had to say something to her, which gave us and the people around us something to talk about for all of 5 minutes. In the end, Jenna got a great view of her dandruff filled jacket when McCain came on stage. I was able to edge her out of the way slightly so Jenna could see. Rude bitch.

Anyways, we saw Senator Lieberman and Secretary Ridge come out and speak, and then McCain came out with his wife and a few others. Cindy spoke briefly, and then Senator McCain gave his usual speech he has been giving over the last few days. Overall, I'm glad I went. It was my first time going to something like that, and I'm glad Jenna got to tag along with me. She told me she had a great time in school today telling her friends and teachers about her experience there.

I couldn't be more disgusted with the poor quality of the pictures, especially since we were so close. i was able to salvage a few of them and make them somewhat presentable. I swear sometimes you have to be outside in bright sunlight with vivid colors for the damn camera to work right. The stage was well lit, but most of them came out blurry and dark. I should have used the small camera instead of the SLR.

Enjoy.

My Geek Side

I've been following the Mars Phoenix Lander on twitter, and was sad to learn today it's more than likely gone to sleep for the last time.  It does not have the energy to awaken due to the extreme cold.  It has a Lazarus mode, which could awaken it if it survives the winter, but it is unlikely.  The poor bastard will just sit there for a million years until it is "rescued".

After watching a story on Spirit and Oppy (Opportunity) last year, my brother and I were surprised how sad we were when it portrayed their inevitable demise (a rather dramatic scene with the rover lowering it's head as the sun set behind it). They were like little people out there, stranded all alone in the freezing temperatures of Mars.  Although they have long outlasted expectations, their time is numbered, too. 

You can follow them here. 

Why do I care?  Grease, of course.  (There are some really neat pictures in that link)!

Should I Sell?

I was lucky enough to get chosen for the opportunity to purchase World Series tickets by registering at phillies.com.  I now have 2 tickets to game 5 on the 27th of October.  After looking at ebay, it is tempting to sell them.  I'd like to go, but it is so hard to get a babysitter here.  It's a Monday night, and we would not get home until midnight or so.  Heather isn't too excited about going, and has already told me to sell her ticket.  I, on the other hand, would like to go.  How often will you get a chance to go to the World Series??  But, I could make at least $500 selling them.

I'm looking for your opinion.  Vote on the right hand side of this page, and let me know what YOU think I should do.

Love is a Four Letter Word

Ainsley singing Metallica.

Maybe I should take her to the concert instead of Heather.

It's the end of the world as we know it.

So I came home today to check my RSS feed.  Here's the first few stories I saw.

• Google Inc. shares fell $25.20, or almost 7%, to $346.01 and put in their lowest close in more than two years. 
• On Monday, Russian equities suffered one of their worst daily losses ever -- the RTS index plunged 19.1% and the Micex index tumbled 18.7%.  Russian President Dmitry Medvedev said Tuesday that the government has decided to allocate 950 billion rubles, or about $36 billion, in subsidized credits to a number of Russian banks for a period of no less than five years 
• U.S. Stocks Battered; Dow, S&P 500 Close At 5-year Low 
  
• British officials could announce a financial bailout plan for its troubled markets as early as Tuesday evening, The Wall Street Journal reported on its Web site Tuesday. The plan could cost up to 45 billion pounds (about $78.64 billion). 
• Speaking to the National Association of Business Economists, Bernanke said, "The combination of the incoming data and recent financial developments suggests that the outlook for economic growth has worsened and that the downside risks to growth have increased.” 
• the Energy Information Administration projected that the average household fuel oil expenditures will be about $2,388; nearly $450 more than last season. Homes that use natural gas will also spend about $155 more than last year. 

And some good news:

• Crude prices will likely average $126 per barrel in 2009, according to a monthly report from the U.S. Energy Department's Energy Information Administration released Tuesday. 

Add to this the fact I'm reading Hot, Flat, and Crowded: Why We Need a Green Revolution--and How It Can Renew America and I just got done reading The Post-American World, and I'm starting to think it's the end of the world as we know it.  And that ain't no song.

All of these stories were posted within a few hours of each other.



We have no reason to fear for ourselves...but fear for our children, we should.

Slow Down!!

This may surprise some of you who think I never have anything negative to say about the current administration.

Seems to me they are either generating fear or using our fear against us to push through legislation they want. I agreed with them when they did it before, but not this time. Not yet, anyways. We do not want to become socialist.

Have You Seen Me Lately???

No.  I'm not talking about the infamous Sam Kinison album, although I can recite it word for word almost 18 years later.

What?  What?  There's 5,000 of you and you didn't bring any fucking food.  I guess you expect me to get it huh?  That's no problem, I'll just create food out of the fucking air.  Thanks!

Well, you said you were the son of God.

I don't think you you're getting the fucking point here you fucking idiots!  I didn't come here to be Jesus the miracle caterer.

But I digress.

I think I've lost myself.  I think it happened somewhere between joining the Army and now.  Or it could have been between graduating high school and now.  It could have been on the trip to the grocery store.  Who the hell knows.  I'm lost.

So how is it I've lost myself.  Beats the crap outta me.  I've already displayed my inability to even identify when I lost myself.

I'm always looking for me.

Am I behind that degree?

Nope. 

A new job!!  One in Pennsylvania!!  Certainly, I will be there!

Not here.

How about behind that new haircut?

Nope.

The dog.  If I get a dog, I will certainly come out of hiding.

No.

How about the kindle?

No.

How about a new tattoo?  Would that do it?

Doubt it.

New clothes?  An updated wardrobe will certainly help me find me.

Nope.

An iphone.  I have to be hiding somewhere in the touch pad.

No way.

If anybody sees me, will they let me know?

Help a Brother Out

Anybody out there cut hair?  I need a new hair cut (style) and I need some help picking it out.  I've been struggling for almost a year now since I decided to get away from the high and tight.

Somebody please help!!

 

Don't we, Heather?

love ya!!

She's so California

This post has nothing to do with a girl or California.  It just happens to be the song I'm listening to right now.


I've read when you have a goal, you should share it with others.  The reasoning being you somehow become more committed to it because you put it out there for others to hold you accountable. 

Not sure if I believe that or not.

A few months ago I made a goal.  It was rather simple.  Exercise.  Every single day.  Period.

Pretty easy, eh?  In all honesty, it was that easy.  I exercised every day.  Sometimes it was something as simple as a walk with the the dog extradonaire.      (Who has been rather lazy @ blogging lately)  Other times I carted, which is walking at a 10% incline (thanks mens health).  Then I started to run, er, trot.  Hell, I even rode my bike around my hometown of Sandwich, Il.  I wasn't concerned with how long I ran, or how hard.  My only goal was to exercise.  Every single day.  

That simple goal had the desired affect I was looking for.  Exercise had become a habit.  You know all those things they say about exercise?  You know, the additional energy, feeling better,etc.  It's all true.  I'd catagorize the additional energy more as a lack of feeling tired all the time.  I'm not all amped up and ready to conquer the world, but I don't want to crash on the weekends all day or when I come home from work.  And those damn afternoon headaches, they are a thing of the past.

Oh yeah.  I lost weight, too.  It came off rather easily.  It does that when you introduce exercise when you aren't very active to begin with.


Well, I'm stumbling a bit, which is the reason for this post.  I still exercise, but it is not every day.  I haven't gained any weight back, but I haven't lost any weight in 2 months.  I still have lots more to go!!


I'm at the point now where I have to work longer and harder to burn the same amount of calories since I've lost weight.  I also have to mix up my workouts so my body does not get "post office letter carrier syndrome".  (Yeah, I walk XXX miles a day, but I'm still a fat bastard)


It's time to introduce strength training into my training plan, too.  The gym I want to join, my membership paid for by BP of course, opens in October.


I should have warned you to look out for flying excuses.


I've gone from obese to just plain old overweight on my BMI index, and I've had to buy some new clothes.  But there's a lot of work to do yet.  I'd like to earn the right to get this, which I've been thinking about getting for over a year now.  Getting rid of my follicular *insert word salad here* would be nice too.  I'm not too concerned with it turning into something worse, but more in just getting rid of it because it makes me look like a teenager.


So there it is.  Out there in the open.  I have a goal to lose additional weight.


I'll just sit here and wait for the motivation to come rushing back to me from sharing my goal with others...

17 January 2009

Finally, Metallica back on tour in the US. They'll be in Philly on 17 Jan and Chicago on 26 January.

Think Heather will go with me??

Vacation Photos

Double Rainbow

This is one of the best rainbows I've seen. You could see it from one end all the way to the other. If you look close enough, you'll see a partial second rainbow.

You can always count on Cavuto

to put things in perspective.
I can't get the embed to work, so I hope you all take the time to watch this video.

Click anywhere above to go to the video.

Orchestrating the Leaving...

I've had my share of practice at leaving.  After joining the Army, leaving for Texas, then Korea, then Texas again, and finally Pennsylvania, I've had the opportunity to improve on what I privately call, "Orchestrating the leaving."


Anybody who has ever left home or a loved one(s) knows the feeling of the storm growing as the days and hours and finally the minutes draw closer to the time of departure.  I've learned that leaving is hard on everybody, not just yourself.  It's important to take everybody into consideration and to try and make it as easy as possible on everybody.  Mothers, in particular, are fragile.  So my rule of thumb...Make it quick.  It's easier on everybody.  Don't stand around and invite a lot of people over a few hours before you leave.  Everybody will just be anxious dreading the moment when you get in your car or get on your plane and go.  It's no fun for anybody.  So make it a drive by.  Hey, I'm leaving.  See you later.  Then run for the door and don't look back.

I broke my standing order when we left Illinois last week.  We had the family over for a cookout and pictures a few hours before we were due to leave.  When my mom walked in the door I knew it was not going to be pretty.  Everybody tried to pretend we weren't leaving in a few hours, but it didn't work.  As the time for us to leave drew closer, there were knowing glances from husband to wife, wife to daughter, son to mother, etc.  Yes, we were telling each other.  The time is getting close, and I am trying to keep it together.  

Soon, Jenna, whom we were leaving in Illinois for an extended vacation, was wrapped in her mother's arms as they cried unashamedly in front of others.  That tore me up.  My old man was outside, and it wasn't because it was nice out.  Even he was afflicted with the anxiety that was hanging over all of us.  

Then the time came for final hugs.  The entire family was outside for all the public to see as we said our goodbyes and wiped away the tears.  It was nearly unbearable.  So much pain being experienced by everybody.


Something that would have been a lot easier had I done a better job at orchestrating the leaving...

Top 10

While at work the other day, a co-worker and myself used a white board to list out our top 10 songs.  We couldn't have been more different!  There's no sex pistols or Elton John on my top 10.  We decided to create a CD with out 10 top and swap them.  But what's a top 10 list without the stories behind them?  So here's my top 10 list with the reasoning behind each of them.  After all, the song is only a small part of the story.  It's the emotions or the memories they stir that tell the real story.

These are not in order.  That would be much too complicated.

Alright Guy, Gary Allan 

I like to think the spirit of this song is me.  I've done some stupid things, and I'm a little rough around the edges, but hey, I'm an alright guy.

 "Now I'm stuck in this jail with a bunch of dumb hicks, and I still don't know why..."

Coma, Guns N' Roses

At just over 10 minutes long, this is epic.  Wherever the song takes you, it always brings you back to the same rhythm.  Each time you listen to it, you discover something new.  A true piece of lyrical and musical art.  A very complex and complicated song.

"No you don't need a doctor, nobody else can heal your soul.  You got your mind in submission, you got your life on the line, but nobody pulled the trigger, they just stepped aside..."

Stupid Boy, Keith Urban

When I first heard this song, it was just ok, but it quickly grew on me.  You can feel the emotion and the pain building throughout the entire song until it finally explodes during the guitar solo at the end.  I tried to get my wife to understand this, but she never looked at songs this way.  After seeing Keith play this in concert, Heather finally got it.

"and you stole her every dream and you crushed her plans..."

Brown-Eyed Girl, Van Morrison

A song about a girl...

and a time we danced; the look in her eye.  I had put that sparkle in her eyes...


Where Ever I May Roam, Metallica

An anthem.  You couldn't turn on MTV without seeing this video.  This song makes you want to go and conquer the world, or at least the day.


"to this game you stay a slave..."


Every Now and Then, Garth Brooks

This song is myself and my friend Brian sitting in his truck.  He'd blare this song and we'd sing along.  He always sang it with such passion, and sometimes I think he forgot I was there.  It was like this song took him somewhere, to somebody.  To this day, I don't know who he longed for while singing this song.  He died many years ago.


"I heard a song on the radio just yesterday, the same one you always asked me to play.  And when the song was over, I wished they'd play it again.  Yes I do think about you every now and then"

Long December, Counting Crows

There's so many gems in this song.  "the feeling it's all a lot of oysters, but no pearls."  "Maybe this year will be better than the last."  "We talk like lions, but we sacrifice like lambs."   A song of depression, of hope.  Whatever you want it to be.


Pour Some Sugar On Me, Def Leppard

The song written with lyrics to fit the riffs.  This is 8th grade all over again.  I had the shirt.  I had the hole in the jeans.  I had the cowboy boots.  I had the hair (still pissed at my mom for not letting me grow it out even longer).


"Love is like a bomb baby c'mon get it on, Livin' like a lover with a radar phone, Lookin' like a tramp like a video vamp, Demolition woman can I be your man"


You Look Good In My Shirt, Keith Urban  (Original Version)


This makes Keith the only artist with 2 songs on here.  The first time I heard this was at his concert in Philly.  I was completely blown away.  What a clever, energetic, and fun song.  Heather and I couldn't stop talking about it.





Black, Pearl Jam

Probably number 1 on this list.  I remember many nights sitting in the dark listening to this song over and over again.  This songs compels you to be moved every time you hear it.  Who can't feel his pain as Eddie wails...

"I know someday you'll have a beautiful life, I know you'll be the sun in somebody else's life, but why, why, why can't it be, why can't it be mine... 

Credit deep_schismic's




Honorable Mention...


Girl School, Britney Fox

This song rocks!!!!  The guitar and drums come together perfectly.

Father's Day 2008

Just another quick post. Happy Father's day to my old man.

More pictures. Tired of them yet? We'll be going to our first NHRA race on Saturday, so we should have some pictures other than our dog and kids. We're getting the VIP treatment all for free courtesy of Castrol (since they sponsor John Force racing). Even get to meet him and Ashley force, along with some other drivers. Too bad I don't have anything for them to sign. Should be interesting nonetheless.

Guess what, guys! More pics.

Here's a pic that Heather took with they were at the beach. I really like it.




And another slide show. I tried for 2 days to get the pic of the creek.



Notice Zippy in the water behind the close up of Ainsley. Zippy looks like he is laughing in the last picture. If only we could get him to get some pictures without the ball in his mouth.

The Creek...Again

I dragged the family out of the house early this morning so we could go play at the creek. The last time we were there, Zippy laid down in the middle of the water. When the current took the ball away from him, he got up and got it, then went back to the same spot and laid down again. He did this about three times before he finally gave up. Of course, we did not have the camera then.

We've been using these creek adventures to practice our camera skills. If only I knew what I was doing on Photoshop Elements. These are unedited, except the black and white.

Oh well. Enjoy the pics.

Fun with the Dog

A neighbor of ours has a female lab that is 1 month younger than Zippy. She told me about a park that has a creek running along the side of it. Her lab had lots of fun playing in the water, so we decided to take Zippy.


Zippy is not trained for off-leash activities, so the first time I took him I went by myself. We walked up to the creek, and he just kept on walking right into the water. I know labs are known to be water dogs, but I always wondered what Zippy would do if given the chance to play in water. Before long, he was sloshing around and having a good time. I brought along his second favorite ball, so he had a fun time chasing it around in the creek.


Now that I (we) had our confidence level up, we took a family trip to the park. We had such a great time. It's just wonderful to see him out there running and having a great time. He's able to stretch his legs and not worry about the electric fence. Don't get me wrong. We keep Zippy well exercised with plenty of long walks, but it was great to see him have some freedom (and come back to us)!


It wasn't long before the girls followed him into the water.

Enjoy the pictures. I snuck one in of Ainsley helping me grill out.

Bear Hunting

On Mother's day, we had planned to go hiking as a family. Heather was sick, so I decided to take the kids and go anyways. This would let Heather rest without the kids bothering her.

We went to French Creek National Park and hiked for about 2 hours. Here's some snapshots from our Bear Hunting Excursion, as Ainsley calls it.

Starting our trip.




Ainsley as the line leader.




Jenna makes it across. Does Ainsley?



One pant leg is darker than the other. She must have put it in the drink.




Best line of the trip goes to Ainsley. While pointing to the pictured scenery and in her best southern accent, "That's a whole lotta' leaves right there."




Most awkward moment: Trying to explain to Ainsley why daddy could go to the bathroom, but she had to hold it. Jenna increased her distance between us during this conversation. She must have felt as goofy as I did.

Ainsley, "But I have to go, Daddy!!" "You just went!" "Now it's my turn."

Jenna................walking away........quickly.

Happy Birthday, Heather

Heather turned the big 3-0 on Monday. I thought it would be nice if I managed to throw her a party. I knew she would never go for one, so I decided to make it a surprise party. A few people from her work came, and her friends from Jersey came, too. I think she was surprised, but I'm not sure. It looked like everybody had a good time. I, unfortunately, got a little too happy a little too soon. I managed not to make an ass out of myself. I'm glad the gang from Jersey came. I don't think I would have gotten anybody out to play bean bag toss if they did not come. My team went undefeated. Poor Tim had to carry his team, but Jess did get to school us in CLR. Okay. It's really LCR, but she was feeling a little happy by the time we got around to playing. She had shown me the correct way to make a lemon drop shot by then.

I was given severe reprimands for not having a cake. I was going to make her my dad's special recipe cake on her actual birthday, but apparently that was a rather stupid idea. The girls had to go out and buy one.

That provided me the opportunity to make Tim suffer through my dissertation on NASCAR.

Jeremy (slurring): "You know, Tim, they make half pound adjustments to those tires, and it can mean the difference between a fifth place car and a first place car."

Tim: "Uh huh. Interesting."

All in all, I think everybody had fun.

Happy birthday, Heather!!

By the way, the french onion dip was good to eat. I called the 10 second rule.

The Difference Between Us & Our Neighbors...

Their cats are named: Arthur & Cocoa

Our cats are named: Schmuck & Weasel

It's going to be tough to bridge that divide.

Another Video

I think this is such a neat program, so I quickly grabbed some old pictures and created another video.

Easter Egg Hunt Insanity

Photo by: Richardbh

We took the kids easter egg hunting today. We started out at the community egg hunt, which went pretty well. The dog extraordinaire got to go out and sniff some butts, and the kids were able to get a lot of eggs.

Heather's friend invited her to go to another egg hunt in a neighboring town, so we all packed into the minivan and went. There were a lot of kids there. The kids were broken down into age groups, so I went with Jenna while Heather went with Ainsley. When they called the 7 and older group over, there was almost a stampede to get to the starting line. This stampede was encouraged by the parents. "Hurry up, Hanna!! You don't want to miss out." "Run, Jordan. Run!"

Oh brother.

As the kids lined up, some of the parents were whipping themselves into a frenzy. One mom even went out into the "egg area", for lack of a better term, and instructed her daughter to run to her and to grab "these" eggs. She would stand there with the basket. It wasn't the last time I had to bite my tongue that day.

There was a guy out there keeping the kids at bay at the starting line, and you could almost feel the frustration in the air from some of the parents. "Just let them go, already." As the guy was talking, some of the kids started to go, and then a parent yelled, "Go, Billy!!" and a massive wave of children moved forward. So much for ready, set, go.

It took less than a minute for all the eggs to be scooped up. Some kids did not get any. As I was walking towards Jenna, one parent was berating her child because she did not get any eggs. She wasn't aggressive enough, according to the mother. The child was near tears, being yelled at in front of all these strangers. If I would have had an egg, I would have walked up to her and given her one. It would have provided me the opportunity to tell the mother to go fuck herself. Real mature, I know. Sometimes you have to tell people like that their behaviour is not acceptable, and telling somebody to go fuck themselves is about as pithy as you can get.

I regret not saying something now.

This was only an Easter egg hunt. I can't imagine what these parents are like at sporting events. Reminds me of playing little league, and having to listen to, "Go, Larrrrrrrrrrrryyyyyyy" from some mother who's only positive in life was watching her pathetic boy play baseball. Man, I felt sorry for that kid. I'm glad my parents sat in the bleachers and conducted themselves appropriately.

Parents these days. I tell ya.

Kindle

I've been enjoying my Kindle since it arrived way back when. I had to wait a little over a month for mine to arrive. There's been many a blog set up to write exclusively about the Kindle, and many groups have been formed for users to love on their Kindle or rant and rave about the long wait time. Amazon has refused to reveal how many they've sold, and they won't say what has caused the delay other than unexpected demand.

Jeff Bezos, after months of silence, has posted a letter on the homepage of Amazon re: the Kindle.

I still love mine.

Photo by bravenewtraveler

I find it easier to be pissed and miserable sometimes than it is to be happy. Being cheerful is hard.

I certainly hope you have all felt the same, or I shall truly feel....miserable.

Like when you get a big ass bonus, only to have big ass bills to pay. Only to have dreamed of the things you could do or buy with what was left, only to have your car need repair 3 days before the deposit hit the bank... and be left with nothing.


Like moving your family to another state for fame and fortune, only to find the fame and fortune wasn't worth dealing with the union loving, lazy ass, back-stabbing, pieces of shit you get to work with.


Like deciding to move home, with or without BP, instead of moving to wherever the next job takes you, only to have that information leaked to family members. Then the reality of the housing market crashes that illusion you hung on the wall right over your big, fat noggin.


Then you see your miserable looking ass in the hallway mirror, and you realize you've been acting like a chump. And you are no chump.

You realize you are debt free (ok...except the mortgage), and you should be thankful you got the bonus. Besides, your wife didn't mean it when she said you could go to London without her. And hey, those repairs were cheaper than a new car, and she's running like a hot rod now.

You realize the move has made you stronger, professionally and personally. You figure out those lazy bastards at work are really leadership challenges in disguise, and you have the skill set to turn them into performers because that is why you were chosen to come to this miserable place in the first place.

You realize you still have things you want to do while you are away from your family. Gettysburg still awaits, as does another trip to DC. You are on the downward slope, and it is only a matter of time now before your children will see your parents on a regular basis.

And you learn to stop your bitching and crying.

And you learn to wash the negativity from your mind, because that is not who you are.

Life. It's Not All About You.

It's been a crazy week. I've been putting in 12-14 hour days making sure the inventory that was scheduled on Friday and Saturday went without a hitch. This was another opportunity for me to put another tick in a box for yet another process I have improved since coming to Warminster 15 months ago. That's why they asked me to come here, and that's why I came. I'm chasing those bigger jobs with bigger pay so I can have bigger toys and the bigger influence and responsibility.

Heather was sick all week. She was sick enough to go to the doctor on Friday and get 3 different meds. Sorry, Heather. I know you're sick, I told her. But they put me in charge of this inventory so I have to see it through. I'll be home as soon as I can. As soon as I can always meant when the kids were already sleeping. Even though she was sick, she took care of the kids while I put in the long hours.

On Thursday, the day before inventory, Jenna had an assembly at school. Part of the assembly was to recognize the student of the quarters. Jenna was one of them. I didn't go. There were too many batch cards to be closed, scales set up and other important things that needed to get done before freezing the books of all transactions. Somebody needed to be there to make sure it all happened, and that somebody was me.

Life. It's not all about you. The person who has been trying to teach me that is my old man. He never got wrapped up in himself. He worked, and he worked hard. He never complained. It was what it was. He still found time to go to all my baseball games, and helped coach a few years. He even spent some time on the baseball board. He went to college at night, and taught Fire Science courses for a community college. And he still made my games.

He's been a volunteer firefighter since....forever. He's given thousands of hours of his personal time helping others and the community. It doesn't matter if it's 1 am or 1 in the afternoon, he goes to all of the calls. It's not about him. It's not about having a flashing blue light in his car. It's not about firefighter decals plastered everywhere. It's about helping others. He identified a serious gap in training way back when, and he went above and beyond to fill that gap. As one chief in a neighboring community told me a few years ago, Mike Pruski has done more than any other person regarding the professional development of all the surrounding community fire departments. This chief serves 30 minutes away and 3 towns over from where my old man does. The sphere of influence is larger than that, and he did it all while thinking of others, not himself. He was trying to teach me a lesson.


My old man turned 60 today.


I forgot.


No present. Not even a card.


I was too wrapped up in my own little world worrying about an inventory that in the grand scheme of things was insignificant.

I remember looking at a black and white picture of my old man in the Air Force in Thailand. For a few moments, my brain was trying to register how I was in a picture taken during Vietnam while in Thailand. I looked just like him then. Heather and even my mom like to tell me how much I'm like my dad. My mannerisms, the way I smile, the way I act and even the way I look.

Nothing could be father from the truth.

The inventory went without a hitch. What used to take 1.5 to 2 days was completed in under 1. Instead of feeling good about my accomplishment, I sit here ashamed. I should have gone to Jenna's assembly to show my support for my daughter who was student of the quarter. I should have gone home and taken care of my sick wife.

I should have gone home to be with my dad on his 60th birthday.

Daytona 500

Damn.

Conversations with Ainsley

It's been just Ainsley and I for the most part this weekend. She's been a ton of fun. Here's just a snippet of some of our conversations.

While in my car heading to the grocery store:

A: It smells. It smells like Zippy's poop.

J: Did you step in some of it?

A: No. It's you car.

J: My car? What do you mean?

A: Your car smells. Really bad. Very badly.

J: It does?

A: You need to clean it.

J: *sniff* *sniff*

She later picked me out a strawberry air freshener for my car.

While getting her out of the car after returning from the grocery store:

A: (with the utmost sincerity) Dad. Will you call me your highness?

J: Yes, dear.

A: No! Your highness.

J: Yes, your highness.

While watching Orangutan Island on Animal Planet:

A: I see his butt. Dad. Look at his butt.

J: *snicker*

At Blockbuster picking out a movie:

J: How about this one?

A: Seen it.

J: This one?

A: We have that one, you silly goose.

J: We don't have this one? Want to get it?

A: I've seen it, you knuckle head.

Early this morning as were we sleeping:

Weazel: Meow. Meow.

A: Shhhhhhhhhh!!!!

Weazel: Meow. Meow.

A: Weazel!! Go to sleep!! It's not time to get up yet!

Weazel: Meow. Meow.

J: *throws pillow at Weazel*

A: I told you to go to sleep, Weazel.

Friday Night Fun

It was another rough week at work, so what better way to unwind than cooking a good meal while partaking in good drinks.

Won't my mom be proud of this one.

Will it be worth it?

Here's an article from the NY Times about the Amazon Kindle.

Mine arrives on Tuesday. I ordered it on 27 December.

You're on Candid Camera

While on this trip to LA, I was surprised at how many times I was on camera.

On the turnpike heading to the airport.

In the parking garage.

In the airport.

At LAX.

On the Hertz bus.

At Hertz.

Leaving Hertz.

At the parking garage for the hotel.

In the hotel.

At certain intersections.

At the donut shop.

At Castrol.

At McDonalds.

At the italian place we stopped to eat at.

And back again.

We are quickly becoming similar to the UK as far as surveillance. Ok. Not that far.

Sitting at LAX waiting on the red eye back home, one has time to think of such things. I hope I can sleep on the plane, because I leave at 10:15 Pacific time and get back at 6:12 am on Friday morning. Straight to work I go.

Such is life. It should only hurt for a little while.

College Grad

I'm in Los Angeles now, but more about that later.

I received confirmation today that I am now a college graduate with a Bachelors of Science.

Yipee.

Now it's time to start on the Masters.

Catch Me if You Can.

A guest post from Sir Zipadelli.

What's happening, my peeps?

Lots of sleeping and licking me balls for me. OK. I lick where I think my balls should be, but they haven't been there in some time.

Anyways, I have a story for you from this weekend. I'm going to use Brad Paisley's song, "Mr. Policeman" to help me tell the story because I was thinking of it the entire time this was happening. The song is about him taunting a policeman to catch him in his 75 Firebird Trans Am. Let me set the stage.

The oldest of the little monsters had just got done taking me for a walk. I had been a good boy on the walk, but it was all part of my master plan. I knew I had her trust, so she dropped the leash when she opened up the door. And we're off!!

In case you can't figure it out, the words in italics are from the song.
Hey! Hey! Mr. Policeman. I bet I can drive faster than you can. Come on hoss let's have some fun, go ahead and shoot me with your radar gun, you look bored and I sure am so catch me if you can. Go on, turn on your bluelights (so pretty). you know you want to, I just flew by. I can see you peeling out, how my dust taste in your mouth, come on Smokey it's time to race. Let's have us a high speed chase.

Now I'm out of the yard and across the street. The daddy monster is out of the house and walking my way. I look at him, more like stare at him,...wait for it....I'm off!! Just like the song says, catch me if you can!! I race to the next street with the fat bastard in hot pursuit. Boy does he look pissed!! By now we're about a block away from the house.

Hey! Hey! Mr. Policeman. A chopper in the air and a couple of swat vans. That's no fair blocking the road, where am I supposed to go, time to use my back-up plan, catch me if you can.

There wasn't a chopper in the air, but now the mama monster is in the van with the smallest monster. They tried blocking me from crossing the street, but I was much too quick.

Hey! Hey! Mr. Policeman. I bet I can run faster than you can. With your big pot belly and your cowboy boots, a hundred bucks says you won't shoot. I know these woods like the back of my hand, catch me if you can!!

I stopped to take a leak and I let the daddy monster get close to me. I sniffed around so he would think I was occupied and not paying attention. I let him get close and then I was off!!

Go on, turn on your spotlight (so shiny). I've got running shoes and I'm younger than you and I've got all night. There's no way your keeping up with me, go on back to Krispy Kreme, If you want to quit I understand. Catch me if you can.

To my immense enjoyment, he ran after me. He chased me for 3 houses and then started to walk. I stopped and turned to look at him thinking, "There's no way you're keeping up with me. If you want to quit, I understand." The dude looked pitiful!!

It was right about now that I saw another dog at the back door of the house I was at. I figured I had some time, so I went up to the door to take a look. You never know, I might just get lucky with a hot dame. Funny enough, this is the part of the song where they just pick for awhile. And then, they pause for a second before they sing...

I'm in the jail house now. I'm in the jail house now. He told me once or twice, son respect my author-a-tie, I'm in the jail house now.

While I was screwing around with the other dog, the daddy monster was able to sneak up on me and grab my leash. I immediately knew I had been beat. He walked me home with my head hung low in shame. I was so confident, and the defeat was crushing. After all the taunting, he had caught me. Even worse, he paraded me through the neighborhood in my defeat.

Later, bitches. I have to go fart on his pillow to get back at him.

If you haven't heard the song, go here and click scroll down to Mr. Policeman. Click on it for a free sample.

Greenville, South Carolina

I haven't been much of a blogger lately. I have to admit that I find Zippy's letter to Santa hilarious. I probably find it a little too funny.

I spent some time at the GE facility in Greenville, SC this week. They make the wind turbines there. They are massive!! I was asked to go there to share best practices with the Castrol people there at their site. I walked away glad that I did not work there.

The most important revelation I walked away with was this:

I need a camera phone.

I love my crack-berry, but why I didn't get one with a camera escapes me. As I waited patiently for my delayed flight back to Philly, there was ample material to post about. Pictures would have definitely brought this post to life.

There were the low-techies. This group of 6 were doing the unthinkable. They didn't have out their laptops or their ipods. No Blackberrys. They were actually talking, and having a good time of it. They were looked at as oddities.

Diabetes boy sat across from me. He had his laptop and ipod going, but he also had one of those pager looking insulin machines hooked up to him.

Crazy tye dye guy was...crazy looking. He looked like Gene Simmons, long hair and all. There were a few times I thought a confrontation was inevitable as he meandered around the terminal mumbling to himself.

Business man was a fit 60ish dude with a tailored suit. Very spiffy.

Knowledge man spoke of his poweress on his phone, while know-it-all Sal told anybody who would listen how great he was at....well, at everything.

Then there was *whistle*. Good lord.

The prep troop, who dropped their bags because they were done lugging them around, sat next to pearly white grandma. Ivan the Russian was rushing to his flight, while what was she thinking gal got off her flight wearing clogs. Scared tennis girl looked like she wanted her mommy, while grunge wanna be had "I don't like your girlfriend" written all over her. Then there was trifecta boy. He had his phone, ipod and laptop burning. What a cliche he was.

Pictures would have added so much more to this dull post.

On a side note, the number of Amazon Kindle sightings: 0

I will say one thing about my trip. All of the people were nice. Genuinely nice. Good southern hospitality.

Me, on the other hand...